Tackling Jealousy With A Sex Therapist - Part Two

“Jealousy doesn’t have to go away, for you to disarm the power it yields.”

Identifying what jealousy is and how we can look at it (see Part One) may be the first step in taming it, but what are some next steps to keep it at bay?

Let’s continue diving in with Los Angeles Sex Therapist Moushumi Ghose and get her thoughts.

“It is important to first of all take ownership of your jealousy. The jealousy is all yours.”

Once we take responsibility of our jealousy, here’s what Mo recommends:

“I often recommend to clients to focus on their achievements, stop comparing themselves to other people, get off of social media where there’s a constant barrage of other people’s accomplishments and beauty and all of these things that we feel we need to compare ourselves to that really don’t support us in our own growth…”

It’s not surprising that mindlessly scrolling through IG and other social media apps can get our hearts racing and “we cannot think straight.” She advises people who can’t get off social media altogether to Mute or Unfollow posts that cause these sort of reactions.

Other steps Mo says to take are:

“…focusing on where we are good and our positive skills is one really great way to break the cycle of jealousy… journaling, doing work around past trauma, getting really clear with your relationship goals and desires and plans, and regularly check and see what you need, what is missing and what would make this situation feel better”

I asked Mo if she thinks we can get rid of jealousy once and for all.

“I don’t believe that we can eradicate jealousy completely unless we lived in a bubble. It’s certainly an uncomfortable feeling, but just like fear, sadness, anxiety, etc, uncomfortable feelings are universal. Jealousy doesn’t have to go away, for you to disarm the power it yields.”

And that, my friends, is up to us.